Monday, July 14, 2008

The Great Remember

My five year old daughter was sitting with me earlier, reminiscing about her preschool graduation (which was a whopping 30 days ago). She was laughing about singing with her friends and she said, "Mommy, that is such a great remember." I started to correct her .... tried to tell her that it was a memory, but it was so damn cute. I'm keeping it. :o)

I think nostalgia has gotten the better of me lately. I know people say that time heals things and changes memories. I'm not sure if that is true or if our minds and hearts just need to be treated like hard drives. We fill them up to the point of capacity and then, we subconsciously make zip files with a thumbnail picture to remind us of what we tucked away in storage. The thumbnails undergo more and more airbrushing with time so that when we go back, it all seems so much prettier.

This little essay is starting off way darker than I intended. I've actually been laughing quite a bit as some people I know have been posting high school pictures of each other on social networks like Facebook and Myspace. The comments have entertained me to no end. Some of the subjects have even sent me emails with, "remember when....." and quite frankly, I do not. Is my hard drive full? Am I a robot? I know that a number of these events must have moved me in some way because I'm sure John Hughes would not have been so successful exploiting teenage angst if it did not exist. Seriously, I don't remember.

For example, I apparently had an argument with one of my friends in the Calhoun High School parking lot circa 1988. Strange to me that there are people who remember it verbatim, but it means nothing to me. I don't think it means anything to the person I was allegedly arguing with either. It had to have meant something to us sometime. Right?

Facebook reunited me with three people who have found permanent residence in my heart. Besides them, I have just found another place to email the people I already talk to....we don't talk about too many old memories, we make new ones. Go figure.

Here's the way it is for me. I'm early-mid 30s so I don't think I'm going senile or anything. I remember going to school every day. I remember the bunch of people who were my BFFs, (funny how short "forever" can become). I remember just enough of it to not even have to zip it. Definitely under a gig.

Somehow I think there must be something wrong with me to not have any of that emotion at my fingertips. I'm not getting all full of love, lust, laughter, tears....anything, bumping into those memories. I giggle a little but that's about it. Sorry class of 1990 - it isn't that I didn't like you then or wouldn't like you now. I must have just shipped it all to Iron Mountain.


jdbauer said...

Hey my 5 year old graduated from pre-school like 30 days ago! The teacher read horoscopes to all the kids and then gave it to them all rolled up. And a cloth containing a a birthstone respective to the month they were born. Denmark is weird. when we worked at One Hour Photo and that crazy clown walked in and started telling Polish jokes? Then he started shooting everyone with a giant, yellow water pistol demanding his pictures for free? And then later that day you got those mylar balloons delivered from the guy at the pizza place??? ;)

~melissa said...

That, my dear, I would have remembered. You're one of the three FFF (Fantastic Facebook Finds.)

Wait - I think that really did happen. And then I got fired, right? Damn clown!



Anonymous said...

i concur. like whoa.
and why is it i still remember every lyric from "the smiths"